This post has been adapted from the chapter, “Lie #7: God Can Set Others Free from Pornography Addiction, but Not Me,” in my new book, 10 Lies Men Believe about Porn. This post is the final part of an 8-week series on life-changing faith. If you would like to begin at part 1, you can do that here.
We often think the sin process begins when we find ourselves in front of the computer with our pants around our ankles. But in reality, the process begins much earlier when you stop trusting—consciously or unconsciously—that Jesus knows (and wants) what is best for you.
If, however, you can learn to recognize the moment when your trust in Him begins to slip, you can stop the sin process before it ever gets a chance to start.
When I end up losing the battle with pornography, it’s a similar process nearly every time. I start thinking about what a life of singleness and celibacy might look like and begin to believe I won’t be able to handle it. I decide that Jesus is being unfair by asking me to remain single and is actually holding out on me. I start thinking that my sexual desires are actually sexual needs, and that Jesus can’t be trusted to meet those needs. It’s up to me to meet them.
Notice how all of this happens before I ever end up in front of the computer. By the time I even sit down to “check my e-mail” or whatever other excuse I’m trying to convince myself is the real reason I’m there, I’ve already decided in my mind what is going to happen. I may still go through the motions of trying to resist the temptation, but I’ve already given myself permission to indulge. Fighting it will only increase my anticipation and make it more pleasurable when I eventually give in.
But if I learn to recognize my dwindling trust back when I first start to question Jesus, I can choose to respond with faith and stop this cycle before it even begins. I can trust that He really does know what I need better than I do. I can recognize that I don’t need sex to meet my need for intimacy; I don’t need a girlfriend or pornography; I only need Jesus.
I can fight the battle of sin by choosing to believe the truth, and the truth will set me free.
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If you aren’t experiencing the freedom from sin Jesus offers you, ask yourself whether it’s a sign that He isn’t trustworthy, or a sign that you aren’t trusting Him. Don’t wait until you feel dead to sin or free from bondage before you believe it to be true about you. Trust that it’s true because the Bible says it is. If you do chose to trust these truths, you will begin to experience them in your life.
God’s goal for your life isn’t for you to try to sin less; it’s to trust Him more. The amazing thing, though, is the more you trust Him, the less you will end up sinning. This is why life for a believer truly begins when you move from mere belief to absolute, unwavering trust; when you believe that every word Jesus said is true; when you get in the wheelbarrow; when you jump off the cliff.
So stop playing whack-a-mole with your sin. Trust that Jesus has already set you free from it, and walk away from the game altogether.
